Goblin War by Jim C. Hines officially hits the shelves today. Jim is funny. Not funny strange or funny weird. The good funny, full of irreverence and knowing winks and a nudge to the ribs. He tells jokes that make you laugh out loud and pass along to friends and family.

jimhines is on a tour through the blogosphere and he was kind enough to stop here along the way and answer a series of questions.

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1) Jig went on a quest, becomes a hero, then went to war. So that's a went, a become, and then another went. What's would Jig like to become next?

Definitely not what he actually becomes, I can tell you that much. More than anything, Jig wants to be left alone. If everyone ignores you, then you don't have to fight ogres or pixies or orcs or humans or anyone else. And nobody tries to kill you.

2) Top Chef -- Goblin. Describe Jig's five course meal for the finals. Bonus points if the recipes use Heinz 57 steak sauce.

Course one: A nice, light bat soup spiced with fire-spider eggs. Broth should be properly filtered to strain out any fur, and the wings should be boiled until they have the texture of soft leather.

Course two: Lizard-fish skewers. If the poisonous spines aren't properly removed, points will be deducted by the surviving judges.

Course three: Baked dwarf, cooked in plate mail, then glazed with a nice honey-mushroom sauce.

Course four: Finger dippers. Fingers should be fried to a golden brown. A variety of dips should be provided, including dwarf gravy (leftover from course three), cockroach paste, and klak beer. Please note that Top Chef -- Goblin is not responsible for the actions of any judge who overindulges in klak beer dip.

Course five: Stuffed snakeskin rolls, with mushrooms and tunnel-cat cheese, sprinkled in blue fungus flakes.

3) Archaeologists discover the trilogy umpteen eons in the future. What do they think of Jig and our culture? What should they think of Jig and our culture?

They know our primitive era is a harsh and violent one, of course, so they're not terribly surprised by the cannibalism and the backstabbing. But they would be so moved by the uncharacteristic courage displayed by the goblin when defending his pet spider that they'll use Technology to bring the author back to life, that he may regale them with further tales of Jig Dragonslayer. Which is exactly what they *should* think and do, so it's all good.

4) Worst (most groan-worthy) pun you've heard about Jig? A dancing theme? A dancing queen? Seventeen?

My agent and I were talking about possible sequels, and which genre might be the most lucrative. He suggested a hot erotic goblin romance: Jig gets Jiggy. It made my brain cry.

5) Define balderdash.

In an election year? Too easy. Give me something a bit more challenging!

6) Wackiest promotion you've ever seen -- and wanted to do?

Remember those Hostess Cupcake ads that used to run in the comic books? I'd love to do something like that. Only when the bad guy goes for the choclatey Hostess cupcakes, my goblins all stab him in the back. That way they have both a main course and a dessert!

7) -- and didn't want to do?

I think I'm going to go with Photoshopping myself into a picture with author Brian Jacques to make myself look like a "real" author.

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Random Goblin Links:

Goblin War Preview - http://www.sff.net/people/jchines/GW.pdf

Author Pic (by Craig Hebert) - http://www.sff.net/people/jchines/Pics/Jim.jpg

Web Site - http://www.jimchines.com